Moving From "No... to How!"

Hello, and happy Monday.

First a quote: “You don’t have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great.” — Zig Ziglar

Last week, we explored a simple but revealing question:

What Does Your Calendar Say About You?

The key then was about, not what you intend to prioritize… but what actually shows up on your calendar and, what gets done. For many of us, that question brings clarity.

It can also bring a bit of discomfort.

Because once we see the gap between what we say and what we actually do … a new challenge emerges:

Why don’t we follow through on what matters most?

A Conversation That Stuck

As part of a personal goal this year, I’ve committed to reaching out, and connecting with, one person each week: someone who had made a positive impact on my life and/or career. (I have a very long list of people in that category.)

One of those recent calls was with a longtime friend, and colleague, of more than 30 + years, Bruce Gentile.

(Pictured above on the left, the two of us; and graduates of a leadership workshop called Managing for Inspired Performance in August of 2000 which Bruce and I co-facilitated.)

The mental mindset shift: moving from an all-to-easy-response of, “No, I can’t do that today” to something more powerful and proactive.

Bruce offered the following wisdom:

“I try to work beyond the “easy no” toward the more difficult; Yes, how do I make this happen.” He called it “Working towards Yes.”

I’ve learned a lot from Bruce over the years. This may be one of the simplest, and most powerful, lessons yet.

A simple, but not-easy-to-do shift in mindsets.

I’ve taken Bruce’s idea and added a few additional thoughts.

Moving from No, to How!

Because most barriers don’t show up as loud, definitive “no’s.”

They tend to show up as quiet, “all-to-easy-to-say-no” rationalizations:

• I don’t have time today.

• I’ll get to it later.

• I want to do it right… so I’ll wait until I have more time.

• My “to-do-list” is overflowing and the short-term fires are raging.

All reasonable. All familiar… and all too easy to rationalize and justify.

And all are very effective at turning a meaningful “yes” into an unintentional “no.”

But, if we pause and ask: “How could I still make this happen?”

Something shifts… our mindsets change in very powerful ways.

A Simple approach you can try this week:

The next time you feel yourself leaning toward “no, instead of how,” try this:

1. Catch the moment

Notice when you’re about to give-in to an easier: “not today.”

2. Ask a better question

• “What’s one small way in which I/we could move this forward?”

3. Take a small step

• Send the note

• Make the quick call

• Block 10 minutes on your calendar

• Take some action, regardless of how small

The Leadership Connection

This isn’t just personal; it’s also about how we lead! Our teams are always watching how we respond to obstacles and the tone we set.

Do we model:

“That won’t work or perhaps, we can’t do it today!”

Or:

“How can we move forward now?” ”

Because here’s the truth:

• Leaders don’t always eliminate barriers.

• They do role model how to move forward, despite those barriers!

That is where momentum begins. That is how we get the flywheel moving. And over time, that approach becomes part of your team’s culture. And as Peter Drucker is believed to have said:

“Culture eats strategy for breakfast!”

How do we close the Gap?

Last week was about self-awareness:

What Does Your Calendar Say About You?

This week is about actions we choose intentionally to take:

What do you do when your priorities meet resistance?

Because that’s where the real test happens:

• Not with intentions.

• Not in self-awareness.

But in the moment you choose between:

“No…”

and

“How do I start now?”

Ask yourself:

• Where have I quietly accepted, or allowed, an “easy no” to something that truly matters?

• What is one small step I can take now to move a priority forward?

Often, the distance between the two questions above… is just one small step in the right direction.

I offer two points for your consideration:

• Your calendar reveals your priorities.

• Your mindset you intentionally choose determines whether you live those priorities, or ignore them, with an easy “no.”

How do I move from, “no, I can’t do it, to… how do I get started now?”

“A year from now you may wish you had started today.” — Karen Lamb

What are your thoughts on this topic?

Please know I always welcome your thoughts, experiences, and advice to share with other readers. That is also true of “I see it differently” thoughts and counterpoints.

How will you live, love, or lead differently—or better—this week?

Bonus Quotes Below

Sincerely,

Bryan Yager

“Expanding Your Capacity for Success”

Have you read my new book, (“How to Transition into Leadership …and Why that Changes Everything?”) It will soon be available as an audio book. Watch for it on Audible and other audio sources too.

While the book focuses primarily on management and leadership, the lessons apply just as powerfully to experienced leaders and our important relationships outside of work.

I have had people tell me they’re buying the book for their teams, even their adult children. What an honor for me!

Click here to order your copy of “How to Transition Into Leadership… and Why That Changes Everything”

What others are saying:

Even though I am not looking to be in a leadership position, I found this book very helpful. I was able to use many of Mr. Yager’s ideas in my personal life, as well as in my work environment.

The book is divided into sections with sub-sections, making it very easy to find any topic you are looking for. The book uses daily examples and quotes that I was able to relate to.

Signed, An Unhappy Customer (This gave me a smile and got my attention!)

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Bonus Quotes:

• “The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them.” — Albert Einstein

• “Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can.” — Arthur Ashe

• “Small disciplines repeated with consistency everyday lead to great achievements.” — John C. Maxwell

• “Excellence is never an accident. It is always the result of high intention, sincere effort, and intelligent execution.” — Aristotle

• “Well done is better than well said.” — Benjamin Franklin

• “Action is the foundational key to all success.” — Pablo Picasso